Showing Kindness and Dutifulness to one’s Parents (Sh Uthaymeen)

Showing Kindness and Dutifulness to one’s Parents

And they [Ahl-us-Sunnah wal-Jamaa’ah] command with being kind and dutiful to one’s parents

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And this is because of the magnitude of their right.

And Allaah has not made anyone’s right follow His right or the right of His Messenger except that of the parents, so He said:

وَاعْبُدُوا اللَّهَ وَلَا تُشْرِكُوا بِهِ شَيْئًا ۖ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا

Worship Allaah and join none with Him in worship, and do good to parents [4:36]

So the right of the Messenger is included within the command to worship Allaah, because worship cannot be correctly established until it is based upon the right of the Messenger ‘alaihisalaatuwassalaam, through loving him and following his way. That is why it is included in His statement, “Worship Allaah and join none with Him in worship”. How could one worship Allaah except through the way and example of the Messenger sallallaahu’alaihiwasallam? So when one worships Allaah in accordance with the legislation of the Messenger, then one would have fulfilled his right.

Then after this comes the right of the parents. So the parents undergo difficulty because of the child, particularly the mother. Allaah the Exalted said:

وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ إِحْسَانًا ۖ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ كُرْهًا وَوَضَعَتْهُ كُرْهًا

And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents. His mother bears him with hardship and she brings him forth with hardship [46:15]

And in another aayah:

وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ

And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship [31:14]

So the mother encounters difficulty during pregnancy and childbirth, and after childbirth, and the mercy and kindness she shows to her child is greater than that of the father for him. Therefore she is the most deserving of the people for one’s companionship and kind treatment over and above even the father.

A man asked, “O Messenger of Allaah, who is the most deserving of my companionship?”. He said, “Your mother”. He said, “Then who?”. He said, “Your mother”. He said, “Then who?”. He said, “Your mother”. Then on the fourth occasion he said, “Then your father”.[1]

And the father likewise encounters difficulty regarding his children, and he worries about that which troubles them and he is happy with that which pleases them and he strives for everything that would comfort them and put them at ease and which would ensure that they have a good life. He would travel high and low to earn a livelihood for himself and for his children.

So both the mother and the father have a right, whatever you were to do for them in terms of actions, it would not fulfill their right and for this reason Allaah ‘azza wajal said:

وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا

And say: “My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was small.” [17:24]

So their right is from before, in that they raised you when you were small when you were not able to benefit or harm yourself. So it is obligatory to show kindness to them. And being dutiful to one’s parents is an individual obligation by consensus. It is for this reason that the Prophet sallallaahu’alaihiwasallam gave precedence to this over jihaad in the way of Allaah, as in the Hadeeth of Ibn Mas’ood. He said, I said, “O Messenger of Allaah! Which of the actions is most beloved to Allaah?”. He said, “Performing the prayer on time”. I said, “Then what?”. He said, “Being kind and dutiful to one’s parents”. I said, “Then what?”. He said, “Jihaad in the way of Allaah”.[2]

The parents are the mother and the father. As for the grandfather and grandmother, then one must show them kind treatment, but it does not equal that shown to one’s parents. This is because the grandparents don’t undergo that which the parents undergo from difficulty, giving attention to and supervising their children. So showing them [the grandparents] kindness is obligatory in the sense of keeping the ties and they are the relations who are most deserving of this. However, regarding al-Birr, or showing kindness and being dutiful, then this is for the mother and the father.

However, what does ‘al-Birr’ mean?

Al-Birr is to try to bring about good as far as one is able, and to restrict harm. Bringing about good in terms of wealth, serving them, and trying to make them happy by, for example, being cheerful, talking to them nicely and treating them well and trying to do all that one can to please them.

It is for this reason that the correct opinion is that it is obligatory upon the children to serve the father and mother, so long as this does not harm the son. So if it were to harm him, then it would not be obligatory to serve them, except in a case of necessity. And therefore we say: Indeed obedience to them is obligatory in that which benefits them and does not harm the son. As for that which harms him, whether this harm is in terms of the religion, such as their commanding him to leave something which is obligatory or to do something which is forbidden, then there is no obedience to them in this; or if this harm is in terms of the worldly affairs, then it is not obligatory to obey them. As for wealth, then it is obligatory upon him to treat them kindly through spending freely upon them, even if it is a large amount, so long as this does not harm him, and he is not dependent upon it. In addition the father is specifically allowed to take from the wealth of his son as he wishes, so long as it does not harm him.

When we reflect upon the state of people today, we find that many of them do not treat their parents kindly rather they openly disobey them and treat them badly. You would find someone being good to his friends and not tiring of sitting with them. However, if he were to sit with his father or mother for just an hour in the day, you would find him restless as though he were on hot coals. So this is not from kind treatment. Rather the one who shows kindness is one who opens his heart to his mother and father and serves them and is devoted to them and who has the utmost eagerness to please them with everything that he is able to do.

And as it is commonly said, “Al-Birr is an investment”. For indeed if someone is good to his parents], then he will receive a great reward in the next life, and he will even be repaid for it in this life. So good or bad treatment of one’s parents is like, as is commonly said, “an investment”, or a loan. If you had been good to your parents, then your children will be good to you, and if you had been disobedient to your parents, then your children will be disobedient to you.

And there are many reports, that from the people there are those who treated their parents well, and their children then treated them well; likewise regarding disobedience there are reports which show that those whose children are disobedient had likewise been disobedient to their parents.

So Ahl-us-Sunnah wal-Jamaa’ah command with being kind and dutiful to one’s parents.

[Taken from Sharh ul-‘Aqeedat-il-Waasitiyyah by Shaikh Ibn ‘Uthaimeen p673-676; Daaruth-Thurayyaa edition 1421 (2000). Translated by Adnaan ibn Salman.]

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[1] Reported by Al-Bukhaaree in the Book of Good Manners, Chapter: Who is the Most Deserving of One’s Companionship; and in Muslim in the Book of Kind Treatment and Keeping the Ties.

[2] Reported by Al-Bukhaaree in the Book of Good Manners, Chapter: Kind treatment and Keeping the Ties and Muslim in the Book of Eemaan.

 

 

The Rites of Hajj and Umrah

Based on the book by Sh al-Albaanee, presented by Abu Talhah (rahimahumAllaah):

Umrah:

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Hajj:

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Sharh-us-Sunnah – Differing in Matters of Fiqh and Blind Following

Sh-S 01 differing and following the evidence

From Sh Fawzaan’s explanation of Sharh-us-Sunnah by Imaam al-Barbahaaree:

Quote:

…as for it being said that ‘we will gather together upon what we agree about and as for what we disagree about then we’ll just pardon each other’.  This is something impossible if it refers to differing in `aqeedah.  However if it is differing in the matter of fiqhand matters of questions of fiqh which are possible can be this way or that way, then that may be allowable, even though even there what is still obligatory is following the evidence even in matters of fiqh.  He the Most High said:

 فَإِن تَنَازَعْتُمْ فِي شَيْءٍ فَرُدُّوهُ إِلَى اللّهِ وَالرَّسُولِ

So if you differ about anything then refer it back to Allaah and to the Messenger

Sooratun-Nisaa (4), aayah 59

[Translated by Abu Talhah rahimahullaah]

Listen to entire lesson here.

Usool-uth-Thalaathah Audios (11-20)

Translation of Sh Fawzaan’s explanation hafizahullaah.

Presented by Abu Talhah Dawud Burbank rahimahullaah.

Lesson 11:  The Proof for Alliance and Dissociation

(And the proof is His saying, He the Most High: You will not find a people who truly believe…)

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Lesson 12:  Al-Haneefiyyah (The Straight and True Religion)

(Know, may Allaah direct you to obedience to Him…)

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Lesson 13: The Greatest Matter Commanded by Allaah is Tawheed

(And that is what Allaah commanded the whole of mankind with…)

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Lesson 14: The Most Serious Thing which Allaah Forbade is Shirk

(And the most serious thing which He forbade is shirk…)

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Lesson 15: The Definition of Shirk; The First Fundamental Principle: Knowledge and Awareness of Allaah

(And it is to call upon other than Him along with Him…)

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Lesson 16: My Lord is Allaah…He is the One Whom I worship and there is no other whom I worship besides Him

(So if it said to you, “Who is your Lord?”…)

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Lesson 17: The Signs of Allaah

(And everything besides Allaah is a created being…)

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Lesson 18: Proof for Allaah’s Lordship and His Sole Right to all Worship

(And the proof is His saying, He the Most High: And from His signs are the night and the day…)

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Lesson 19: More Proof for Allaah’s Lordship and His Sole Right to all Worship

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Lesson 20: The Lord is the One Who is Worshipped; The Meaning and Types of Worship

(And Ar-Rabb (the Lord) is the One Who is worshipped…)

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Chapters from the Life of the Messenger

 Al-Fusool fee Seerat-ir-Rasool (sallAllaahu’alaihiwasallam) – 
by al-Imaam, al-Haafiz, Ismaa’eel ibn ‘Umar ibn Katheer al-Qurashee [701 – 774H]

 

These audio lessons are a translation of the above book by the famous scholar Ibn Katheer,  along with side points  discussing  the authenticity of the narrations mentioned, as well as other beneficial narrations. An extremely valuable resource given the lack of authentic material on the subject of the life of our beloved Prophet (sallAllaahu’alaihiwasallam).
Translated by Abu Talhah Dawud ibn Ronald Burbank.
All lectures have been uploaded with the permission of the translator.

 

The distinctive Characteristics of the book ‘Al-Fusool’:

1) The book is divided into two parts:
The First Part: The Seerah of the Messenger and his military expeditions.
The Second Part: The Signs of his Prophethood, his characteristics, and the things
particular to him.

2) This book is not an abridgement of, or an extraction from ‘al-Bidaayah wan-

Nihaayah’, but rather it is an independent book that stands on its own merit. The
author compiled it from the works of the fine scholars who preceded him.

3) Despite its small size it is replete with information; it is comprehensive and

beneficial.

4) It is simple in its style.


5) It narrates events and occurrences in sequence.


6) Ibn Katheer took benefit from the previous works, but he avoided reports with

weak chains of narration. He sometimes mentions them, however, and then draws
attention to them, or he criticizes them. 
(Taken from the Introduction to the book)

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Lesson 1 – Introduction to the Seerah; The Prophet’s Lineage (sallAllaahu’alaihiwasallam)

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Lesson 2 – His Birth (sallAllaahu’alaihiwasallam)

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Lesson 3 – Prophethood

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Lesson 4 – The Hijrah (migration) to Abyssinia

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Entire Playlist:

 

Please note that Abu Talhah did not complete this series of recordings during his lifetime rahimahullaah.

How quickly man forgets Allaah’s blessings upon him

The scholar  Abdur Rahmaan ibn Nasir as Sa’dee rahimahullaah said about the statement of Allaah, the Most High:

<<And when some harm touches man, he calls upon his Lord repentantly.
Then when He bestows a blessing upon him from Himself, he forgets that which he was supplicating about beforehand and he sets up rivals along with Allaah.>>
(Soorah az Zumar (39) aayah 8)

He, the Most High, informs (us) of His generosity to His servant, and His fine treatment and goodness to him – and how little is the gratitude of His servant.

And that when harm touches him, by way of illness or poverty or falling into difficulty at sea or other than that (and) that he knows that none can save him in this situation except Allaah, then he calls upon Him beseeching (Him) and turning in repentance; and he seeks rescue from Him for the removal of that which has befallen him and he implores (Him) in that.

Then when He bestows a blessing – (meaning) Allaah

a blessing upon him from Himself – in that He takes away the harm and distress that he had

he forgets that which he was supplicating about beforehand –  meaning: he forgets that harm about which he had called upon Allaah; and he continues as if no harm had afflicted him and he persists upon his shirk.

(Tayseer ul Kareem ir Rahmaan of as Sa’dee rahimahullaah, translated by Nasser ibn Najam)

The wisdom behind the sending of the Messengers

With regards to the hikmah behind the sending of the Messengers,
Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al ‘Uthaymeen rahimahullaah
states:

So a messenger was sent to every nation from the time of Nooh up till the time of our Prophet Muhammad sall Allaahu‘alaihi wa
sallam.

And the hikmah behind the sending of the Messengers was:

a) to establish the proof. He, the Most High, said:

Messengers as bearers of good tidings and warners in order that mankind
should have no plea against Allaah after the coming of the
Messengers…
Soorah an Nisaa (4) aayah 165

b) as a mercy – as per His statement, He the Most High:

And We did not send you except as a mercy to all
creation.
Soorah al Anbiyaa (21) aayah 207

c) to make clear the path leading to Allaah, the Most High – because
the person does not know what Allaah has made obligatory in a detailed manner
except through the path of the Messengers.

(Al qawl ul mufeed (1/27 to 28) of Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al
‘Uthaymeen rahimahullaah, translated by Nasser ibn Najam)